Like a swatted fly (叩かれたハエ) translation patch release

Warning: this VN contains explicit rape scenes and very mean words toward those of a homosexual orientation.

Yoshida was forced to give up his seat in the prefectural legislature due to a scandal caused by his imprecautions towards homosexuals. He decides to stay in the hospital for a while, feigning illness, to let the heat die down. But the hospital turns out to be a wretched hive of sapphic debauchery!
(Or so he thinks.)
He decides that corrective punishment is in order – and there is nothing for it but to assault the damned gays with his own two hands.
(Or so he thinks.)
“I’ll teach those accursed virgins just how wonderful sex with a man is!” he thinks to himself.
(Yoshida thinks all lesbians are virgins.)

-DLsite Japan description, own translation (vndb)

>>>DOWNLOAD PATCH HERE<<<

This patch should work with the DLsite English as well as the DLsite Japan version, I think they’re the same. To use, place patch.xp3 in the game directory (where 叩かれたハエ.eXe is). If you can’t pay 108 yen on DLsite for whatever reason (well, it’s 54 right now…), I’m sure lewd cat noise will provide an alternative if you look for 叩かれたハエ.

…Okay, so why the fuck did I pick this thing to translate? Well the thing is, it’s written in this distant, formal, acerbic third person. Combine that with the fun of writing a raging bigot (related: I’ve always wanted to do my own take on Takuji’s classroom speech in Subahibi), the rape scenes being kind of hot (related: I have no standards), the surprisingly amusing plot, and the low-ass line count, I was convinced: I had to do it. It was just too good a match for a style I love to write in; not having to limit your vocabulary to write to the work’s level is hella feeling. I might have gone a bit further than the original, but I think I kept it within acceptable bounds. Enjoy, and maybe fap.

What, you’re still here? fine, STORY TIME.

How did I find it, you ask? I think originally someone just clicked random on vndb, saw the misleading dlsite description, and posted it in some Discord I frequented. Having read the description, I was intrigued – it looked like a horrible glorious disaster of a concept, and raping lesbians feels kind of like the ultimate version of my rape fetish (dont kinkshame ok). As such, entirely bamboozled as to what it really contained, I took a look at とある cat-fancying website and found an acquisition method. Said acquisition method took like a week to actually yield anything, but one day I looked at my bit flow coordination program of choice, and whoa, the thing was dubiously mine. The rest, as they say, is history.

Tech autism:

The original music and sfx is way too high, so their levels have been adjusted in the patch. The help menu option did nothing, so it was removed. A few points to save at have been added, though I didnt go crazy (original only ever took you to the start).

Word wrapping is done using insani’s word wrapping program from their xp3tools suite (I had to resave the output file with notepad++ after adding then deleting a space because it fucked it somehow, shit program tbh). Indentation and paging was done manually, and for indentation I’m using a self-defined tag; classy presentation, brah. I love the way I change the font color and take it back and it’s just spaces so it doesn’t show, instead of actually figuring out how to just output 4 spaces in a krkr macro. WHATEVER.

Em dashes are done using the unicode U+2015 HORIZONTAL BAR character ―. I couldnt be arsed to figure out a way to include a font that had actual em dashes. And I’d already done some formatting in the font I was using before. Don’t be me people. Em dashes are spaced because fuck you, I like how spaced em dashes look and no style guide will convince me otherwise. Thanks.

Credits:

Translation, Image ‘editing’, Hacking, Autism – Zakamutt

They say third time’s the charm, so I’m sure this one will get a million downloads and propel me into eternal e-fame. Okay so what I actually predict is <japanese porn game>download will make a prepatched release which will get 10x as many downloads as the patch, but anyway. Please do make me feel proud of translating a game I have taken to calling “lesbian rape”, despite it not having any lesbians.